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Dreams about something bigger ...
Deep sadness Here is what I have been feeling in the last couple of weeks. This could be called longing for something or someone, but no, this feeling is not longing, because it does not have a shade of negative. You can call this feeling light, but at the same time, it permeates with its incomprehensibility (in the sense of the nature of occurrence) and the impossibility of doing something with this experience (giving it an outlet somewhere). Indeed, such a deep experience that I can’t find exact words to describe it.
It has been visiting me lately quite often. Arguing at the same time that everything seems to be good in life, nevertheless, I remain with a feeling that I could call an experience of something greater in myself and longing for that most: it is about my current capabilities and abilities limited to the limits of my physical existence here, as a person on earth.
As sung in the song BG "Dreams about something more ..."
And this is not crazy nonsense)) I am fully aware of how and where I am present.And with my feelings I'm in tune. Therefore, there can be no mistake, this experience is not so much my experience as that Soul, which has a body that I call myself. And the subtext of this feeling is the longing for itself of that which is not only me present, but that which is Soul. Which embodies in itself and me, and, maybe, a bunch of options for me, but also something essential that is in all of us, and is at the same time something immeasurably large. I feel in this sadness the melancholy of the Soul itself. Perhaps this will be the most accurate description of my experience.
Since childhood, I remember this feeling as a feeling of expansion, which appeared to me when I looked at the sky. An interesting feeling - as if there is a lot of air in me, and it does not fit in me - I begin to expand like a balloon. I do not remember anything negative in connection with this feeling, just a curious misunderstanding of what is happening with me. And as soon as there were attempts to somehow understand what was happening, this experience ceased. But the beginning of it has always been this way - the view of the sky, the feeling of filling and expanding, the excess air in me, which turns me into some kind of disembodied being, more precisely, into something that exists without a body, into something that is larger than it.
According to the description is similar to the state of enlightenment.However, having experienced it in adulthood, I still assume that it was not quite the same enlightenment, it is more like the experiences of the Soul, which still remembered itself, since the child did not go so far from the sky. I think that this is also the case for the emotional coloring of the experience that accompanied the impressions of that time and my real sadness-sadness about something more inside and outside of me.
It is interesting to write about it, realizing that this text can be considered a fantasy by those who did not feel the same, or simply by the desire to depict something, or perhaps by something else from the field of literary fiction. Much has to read in the discussions of different people of different texts and thoughts.
But it was very important for me to write it down.
Perhaps it is not so important to lay out for all to see. However, not very long ago, I have been doing this for those people who are experiencing or have experienced something similar and may well be asking questions about what is happening and how to understand all this. Many generally accept these experiences for the onset of insanity. Just for this reason I want to inform you that it is not always necessary to worry if you do not have other symptoms that indicate that you are breaking away from reality ...
As for the phrase “go crazy” - yes, this is probably some kind of escape from the mind.From the mind, which is a machine for memorizing old behavioral programs and managing a bio-computer, limiting a person’s view of the world and life within the scope of the task that was obtained in childhood as the only possible model of the world. And which allows him to exist in only one quality and form, limited to those behavioral patterns that he learned and did not dare to think about and change.
And thank God for such a departure from such a mind)
For the world is inexpressibly larger, broader, and generally not measured by those measures that are accepted as the only true ones in the space adopted by science, called the globe.
Probably, it was not for nothing that the book “One Hundred Years of Solitude,” which I was impressed with for the first time during my student years, once again came to me. And two phrases from it, which I now understand as evidence of the multiplicity of worlds (parallel realities) and the "casts" of the same person.
The first phrase sunk into the heart with a sense of novelty (and it is akin to that sense of expansion that I once experienced in childhood): “The world was still so new that many things had no name and had to be pointed at.”
And the second one, so bitter and sincere at the same time, which always caused tears of shock in me - such as if I witnessed the scene described in the novel: “... a transparent (or ghostly) city will be swept from the ground by a hurricane and erased from the memory of people in the very moment when Aureliano Babilonya finishes deciphering the parchments, and that everything written in them will never be repeated for anything else, for THOSE HUMAN CHILDREN DOORED FOR ONE YEARS OF LONELINESS, IT IS NOT SUBTENDED TO APPEAR TO THE WOMEN.
Thanks to these two thoughts, set forth like this ..., I have become deeply understood the phrase "People do not change." It is about the fact that this most essential thing has been and is always, and it remains unchanged in man. Only someone could find it in himself, and someone - not. And someone even drove him out of himself. After all, initially everything is endowed with the soul (otherwise why would they have been given the experience of human embodiment?).
But what is being done with it further, this is already - the story of the incarnation and movement along one of the chosen realities. They are not chosen by the fact that a person changes himself. No, he can only change his beliefs (!), Behavior, forms and methods of self-expression, and with it his embodiment in one form or another and quality changes.The realities are chosen due to the expansion of man’s knowledge of the world and himself in it, and him in himself. And nothing else changes. Therefore, there is no time as a chronology. There is time as a flow and there is a quality of human being in it.
What quality is the holding of chronological time, with which a person fills his life, in such a "hypostasis" and reality, at this time he stays or turns out. And so, he was, is and remains (so far unchanged) the same Essence-Soul, which gains experience in human life in the form in which it allows the body to operate with its bio-computer (mind). In the place that represents the "transparent (or ghostly) city" ...
And, yes, there is also such a term as “assembly point”. There are people who have drastically changed this assemblage point of themselves and not just moved from one train of reality to another, but went far beyond the station and the very roads along which trains move. After all, everything that happens is happening not only in the space we used to see it.
You will not understand this with your mind: in the same way, the logical arguments that are customary and understandable to us. This can only be experienced and / or felt.This Knowledge (as far as I was able to know) opens beyond the edge when a person moves from fear to faith. And by faith, in this case, I do not mean belonging to a particular religion. Faith is a way of knowing the world and a way of gaining a new experience. And - a way of transition from one parallel to another, from one self to another self. But the same thing in the depths of the Soul.
Why did you write? To write, while able to collect all the arguments together. And in order to tell those who are in contact with the Soul - let's try to make sure that a person as a species is not removed from the general plan. It's so great to live on the Earth and feel life with the help of everything that is given to man as the likeness of the Creator and the creation of nature!